Sunday, April 30, 2017

30-04-17

Its been more than 2 months since I've updated.

2 weeks ago I went to a trip to Tokyo by myself.

Ok, maybe not really by myself because I shared the Airbnb accomodation with one friend but throughout the trip we travelled by ourselves and we only like meet up for dinner or breakfast. So the rest of the time we OTOT and travel to places we wanna go unless we having the same destination.

It was a fresh experience for me because usually I travel with my friends and most of the time they are the ones making the planning and the travelling which I will just turn on easy mode and follow without thinking.

But this time round everything I was alone, so I could not really depend on anybody for directions and instructions on how to go to a certain place. So I could gain more experience in travelling and moving around even when I am going to some other countries.

Travelling alone has its pros and cons also as nothing is perfect.

The good things of travelling alone is I dun have to follow a strict schedule as I'm doing everything alone. If I happen to wake up late den I can just change my schedule and places that I wanna go to another place or I can just go to the place later den the timing that I have planned initially.

Secondly I do you have to wait for others or vice versa as like I said earlier, I'm just alone. Coz I am someone that always frequent the toilet be it small business or big business. So that travelling alone I have the freedom to take my own sweet time in doing the " business " I want and I do not have to rush so that the others do not have to wait for me.

Thirdly is I can go any place that I want and I can stay at that place as long as I want. Like I can go Akihabara from 11am to 10pm, slowly walk around all the places and shops that I have interest in. So much freedom.

But there are the bad things also like there is nobody to help u take photos so mostly solo travellers they seldom have photos of themselves and usually is photos of surroundings.

When you're travelling like taking the train or bus, walking around or having meals, you will feel lonely. The first two days will be ok because you will feel very occupied as its a fresh experience but after maybe the 2nd day you will start to feel bored because every meal will be like a lonely meal.

But I kinda like this solo travelling because more of me inside I am those that prefer to do things alone and not always stick around in a group.

I will find a chance and solo travel to Tokyo again as Tokyo is actually such a solo place to travel to.

Monday, February 13, 2017

13-02-17

Wow, its been more den a month since I've updated.

January has been a very busy month for me.

It was the month that I had like 4 medical appts for the whole month, one every week. The time wasted to on the waiting and the amount of money needed to spend on all these medical bills is so scary.

All the 4 medical appts their bills add up together is like around 1.2k for the whole month. Its like 60% of my salary already, FML man seriously.

And Jamuary is the month I need to really settle my uncle's flat like going down to HDB to settle the first appointment with the buyer. Heng the buyer is a nice person at least not so stress.

And of course with CNY in January we can actually so call have a long weekend because its from Saturday to Monday which we have a day more but actually Chinese New Year is like even more tiring den normal because we need to go for visiting aka Bai Nian which sometimes takes the whole day from morning to night. But for me its like the only time I see my cousins because we only meet up like once a year which is chinese new year so maybe the tiredness is all worth it we always chitchat about alot of things and catching up.

But because of all of these events my credit card bills is so chor that I do not have any money to spend for Feb because I'm only left with like a few hundred dollars for the whole month so I need to scrimp through the month. But the lucky thing is this month only got 28 days ! LOL ! So at least I can discount for a few days so still not that bad.

Damm lazy to write anymore because its like 1230am now and tml is a working day. I think I better get some sleep now.

Till the next time . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Monday, January 09, 2017

09-01-17

The year 2016 is a year that has alot of first time for me.

Its the first time that I went to Japan for 3 times in a year.

Japan is such a nice country that has alot of interest to me as I grew up watching japan anime, japan drama and of course listening to Jpop.

And its the first time that I went Japan 3 times and its 3 totally different group of people.


First group are with Shawn and Jeremy. I've went overseas with Shawn for a few times already and its our 2nd time to Japan together but Jeremy is his first time to Japan.

Actually I'm quite surprised that its Jeremy's first time to Japan because usually for us that like Japan culture should have gone quite early.



The 2nd group is which Nicholas and Sophia which is a first for me also.

We went on this trip is because I was a lucky draw winner from a contest and they work for the organiser  so this trip is more considered as a working trip for them and a lucky trip for me.



And the 3rd group are with long times frenz that we know for at least 10 or more years already. Although there are some differences in views and things happens in Japan but still it was quite an enjoyable trip with them and of course we also had our first time experience in Japan.


WE MANAGED TO GET TO WATCH A J-LEAGUE MATCH ! ! ! ! !

The atmosphere of a J-League match is so good compared to our S-League because the fans of the clubs are really quite hardcore and they are very enthu also. Somemore we managed to get to watch the match or Urawa Reds Diamond vs Gamba Osaka which is the 1st in table going against the 3rd on the table.

All these are good experience for the year 2016 as they are all the first for me.

There are still a few more but I'm too lazy to write now.

Shall be back soon . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Tuesday, January 03, 2017

03-01-17


2016 marks the 5th anniversary of our good friend Justin.

5yrs ago Justin he passed away due to a heart problem and ever since I felt I have lost a friend. I may not be very close to him but he was a very nice person. He was a very onz and steady person. Whenever we need a eating kaki, movie kaki or whatever kaki he is always ok with it and no matter how late how far, he is always so willing to send us home even when it is not on the way.

Every year without fail, we will either visit him 1 day before his anniversary or on the day of his anniversary. Usually we will visit one day before his anniversary and quite late at night because due to our work timing, we can only visit him like after 10pm at night which to be honest is kinda creepy even though that place is not say a graveyard or something, but the place is like total darkness so we need to use our phones as light to walk around the place.

Everytime when we visit Justin at his tablet, we will always write a card to tell him how much we miss him and we will sign on the card and stick there. And sometimes we will ask him for some 4D numbers, the process always brings us much fun and laughter. And we know he will approve of our actions and also laugh with us together.

Sometimes I always think of how our life is so precious and fragile. Its like anytime anywhere we will just leave this world.

So I always feel that we should always plan our life in case anything happens to ourself, like buying insurance, letting your loved ones or your good frenz know like your ATM pin number and email passwords so that in case anything happens, they will be able to retrieve information needed.

Like I'm always thinking of how to do all these when I'm still alive and kicking so that if anything happens to me, at least I am not a burden to everybody because the people around me will be able to settle the problems when I'm not around anymore.

People around me always feel that I have a very negative thinking about my life because I'm so full of illness but I just feel that its something that I should do and its my responsibility to get everything ready in case of anything happens and do not impose any trouble to people around me when I'm not around anymore.

Always so much thoughts in my mind, so much planning to do.

Oh well, this is life. Either you trouble people or people trouble you.

Logging off, will blog more this year.


Sunday, January 01, 2017

01-01-17

WOW ! ITS 2017 ALREADY !

Time flies so fast, today is already the first day of the year 2017.

2016 has been a good and bad year for me.

One year has so many days and everyday anything can happen, be it good or bad.

What we need to do is to just live through what is being thrown to us everyday and gain experience through solving all the problems.

Everyday we have so many things we have to make decisions, be it what time to wake up, what to have for a meal, what time to sleep, what to do during free time.

Every decision I feel is a step of moving forward in life. Sometimes you may move faster, sometimes you may move slower. But the most important thing is to not stop moving forward.

Sometimes you may feel that the step forward may be a failure step that you may fall, but at least you made that step forward. If you fall from that step, stand up and move forward again as you never know what is lying ahead of that route.

But I feel most people have fear of failing, same like me. We always want to make the step forward, but we are afraid of falling because sometimes once we fall we are unable to stand up anymore. The fall inflicts fear and lost of confidence. Coz when sometimes the confidence shatters, its too hard to recover from it.

I feel everybody needs to have a certain amount of confidence when we do things. Coz when we have confidence, we're able to convince people to trust us in whatever things we do.

But of course careful planning and luck plays a part in everything we do. Everyday in our life we are always planning and predicting what will happen in everything we do. From waking up in the morning until sleeping at night, we are making decisions in every moment.

Like sometimes you will feel like sleeping for 10 more mins before you wake up to start your day, but during that 10mins you will think like " What if I wake up 10mins later and I will be late for work or school ? Will I be able to make it to the busstop ? Will the bus arrive on time ? If the bus doesn't arrive on time will I be able to get a taxi ? "

Everyday every moment there will be so many questions running in your head and you will be making decision for everything you are gonna do with all the planning and all the answers.

Everyday is a step forward, every step forward is a challenge in life.

I hope 2017 has alot challenges for me so that I can gain more experience in life.

Sunday, November 27, 2016

27-11-16

Feeling very bored nowadays.

Somehow nowadays I cannot motivate myself to do anything, I wonder izzit that I am reaching mid-life crisis.

I tend to think alot more about my life and the things and people that is around me.

I tend to be upset easily about alot of things nowadays. Its like I am affected very easily about things.

Like 2 months ago when I know Kim Sohyun is coming to Singapore and at that time I am flying to Japan for holidays, den I feel like so down that I am unable to do anything until I found a solution to be able to see her and my mood just turned 360 degrees to become so happy.

I keep thinking like I feel like a burden to the people around me. Its like because of me the people around me all have to change because of me.

Like when I go out with my group of ITE friends, coz they are like 3 couples which I'm the only one thats single, we always have to find seats for meals in odd numbers like 3 5 or 7. And we all know odd number tables are so hard to find in places as they are usually a square table in 4 or 8. So usually I'll just tell them that I'm not free so as to not have so much trouble because of me.

I mean of course I also wanna meet them up for meals and gatherings, but sometimes its just prove to be too troublesome because of just adding me in. So if me not joining will be so much easier for everybody, I mean why not. Having a person less but it makes everything so much easier, of course just do it. It makes things easier for everybody and it doesn't make anybody feel bad also. I wun feel bad because I caused that trouble of having to look for one more seat for me and they dun have to feel bad for not asking me to join them.

I just feel doing everything alone is so much easier den when with people. Like I can eat what I want, go where I want and do what I want.

Sometimes after work, I just feel like having something I wanna eat for dinner. After that I will just get a drink, put on my earphones listening to my mp3 player and just walk around with no objective. I will just like go somewhere or some mall and just walk around looking at stuffs and people watching. I feel very at ease when I do that as I do not have to think of what to do later. I will just walk around everywhere feeling relaxed and quiet, having the moment of not having to think about anything, just all the me time that I want.

Alot of my friends they say they cannot understand my actions like always not joining them for meals and gatherings but rather go out alone and walk around.

I mean of course not everybody understand what I am thinking because all of us have different life experiences. I'm not saying my life is so pathetic and sad. Of course I also feel I have a good life but everybody's view in life is different and what everybody wants to do is different.

I just feel sometimes everybody should try to put themselves is another person's view and you can understand more about the life everybody have, but all these is easier said den done.

If everybody had a choice, everybody will want a life that is perfect for themselves.

Ok, going off. Enough ranting for a day already.

Saturday, November 12, 2016

12-11-16

Sometimes I'm always thinking like what have I achieved in my this 33yrs of life as I'm 33 yrs old.

I am always thinking like what exactly am I good at because I realise that I'm not good at anything that I can do.

I think the only achievements I have in my life is getting A1 for Maths for 'O' Levels and getting my class3 license. Other den that I really can't think of any achievements I have.

There are like so many things that I like to do but I just simply cannot do them well because I have quite a weak mentality which I always give up easily when I fail at some stuffs.

Its like I like to play video games but somehow I suck at it. I like to play fighting games and I like to play it so called competitively because I find playing with people is very fun but somehow I just suck at it no matter how much I play it. Its like my personal ability is so lousy because I am unable to read the game and read my opponents which I always get KOed easily.

I like to watch football but I suck at playing football games like Fifa and Football Manager.

I like the Japanese language and culture but somehow I am just unable to learn them even though I went for lessons.

Sometimes I just feel that my personal ability is like so low that I cannot excel in anything I do and I am always unable to motivate myself in doing something.

I feel that I belong to the kind of person that people say that doesn't care about anything and having short term interest as I always do something and den stop after awhile.

But to be honest, I feel I dun really suck at doing things but at the same time I do not excel in whatever I do. I am just like the average person u see everywhere.

Oh well, when you're not a capable person that you are just like me.

Logging off, posting again soon.