30-11-2013

Back here to update. 

Just one more month and its gonna be 2014. 

The year 2013 is definitely a bad year for me, nothing good happens.

My health is getting from bad to worse. My diabetes is like not very under control even though I have been trying hard to avoid all the sweet stuffs and of course trying to eat lesser den usual, But still there doesn't seem to have any improvement to the condition.

And today I went to see a doctor aa I'm having some chestpains and sometimes it leads to some breathing difficulties.

After the visit to the doctor, the doctor say he feels something is not right to my heart so he gave me a referral letter to the polyclinic so that I can do an even more thorough checkup.

Seriously man, what is happening.

Just directly after hitting 30, so many things is happening to me. I dun even know why I will have kena all these bullshit.

Life is so unfair, I admit that I'm not any nice guy but I'm not bad until the extent that you have to punish me by giving me even more illnesses.

Since 13yrs old I cannot even live like a normal13yrs old boy. I can't take softdrinks, I can't eat candy and of course more other factors and stuffs.

But at least now I know this is at the highest point of my life, everything will juz dlowly go down as my life just cannot get any better, it can only get worse.

Worrying so much about everything does not solve the problem. Worrying is just like standing one side and using your eyepower to just stare at the problem and hope that the problem will solve by himself.

I'm just so sad and feeling down now. Every problem just come one after another.

But oh well, there's nothing much I can do also. The only thing I can so is to get medication and make myself as good as possible.

18-11-2013

It's already November, it's less den 60 days to the year 2014.

Time flies too fast, 2014 coming and I've hit 30.

Everybody say hitting 30 years old and it will be a new start of your life journey.

It applies to alot of people but maybe not me. Alot of my friends who are at the same age as me have already gotten married and have kids already. It's a brand new life for them as their life goes on to the next stage.

As for me, nothing have changed. Still single and enjoying the freedom I'm having now.

It's always the common question that the elderly and my friends ask me.

" Chang ah, when are you gonna find a girlfriend and settle down ah ? "

It's been asked for like one million times and I've answered them also for a million times.

I also do want to find a person I like and settle down with her.

Easier said then done.

The society that I live now is so practical. Everything that is required to have a stable life is something that I do not have and do not own.

I'm not complaining that my life sucks, I'm actually very contented with what I have now.

I have an understanding mom which always looks out for me and take care of all my needs which I do not have to stress on. Although naggy at times until it reaches an unbearable stage, but deep inside I know all her words are full of parental love and concern. I believe it's a diffcult road for her as my dad passed away when I was 14 years old. She had to single handedly take care of me and my sister during the most difficult period of her life. Maybe I do not say it everytime but I do love my mom for all the things that she have done for me.

I have a job with nice bosses that also always take care of me when I needed help. I actually do really want to thank them as they hired me few years back when I was struggling to find a job after I've ORD from NS. If without them I do not know what would I have been doing now. But everything has to end one day and my turn is coming. I've had a job offer and I've decided to move over to help out my friend as he had just taken over a business and he needs someone to help him make his business prosper.

I have tons of good friends which revolves around my life. Be it good, bad, nice or irritating. It is a pleasure to get to know all of you so that I'm able to experience my life to the fullest.

Friendship is something that is unexplainable to me. Some friends you may have known them for like 10 years but you still have that uncomfortable feeling when you are with them. Some friends which you have just befriended maybe for just one day and you'll feel like knowing them for the past 10 or 20 years.

I always have this conversation with my friends about friendship. We all agree that friendship requires fate, not everybody can click with everybody.

I do not agree that I am the person that clicks with everybody but somehow I do have quite a number of friends. I belong to the type that if you do not start the conversation with me, I'll never go and start to have a conversation with you unless you're a girl.

I feel that maybe it's because of the school that I have attended makes me give people the feeling that I'm someone that you can talk to easily. Maybe it's because I do have alot of common topic with everybody thats why I can talk tons of shit with people.

Hmmm, actually I do not really know what I'm writing now as I suddenly got some random thoughts now and I do not know how to put them in words.

I shall stop now and continue another day.

07/11/2013

Wah, long time since I've updated. Much to say but hard to write.

How should I start and what should I say first.

Hmmmmm

Daily life always the same, working and going home as usual. Meet up with friends has been lesser and lesser den usual. Everybody have been busy with their own lives.

Met up with the ITE first year gang on a Saturday to The Beer Market for some chill out session which means drinking and watching football matches together, plus there is Halloween celebrations at The Beer Market too.

Feeling happy and looking forward to the meet up session, but the session in the end is not as happy as we expected, or maybe as what I expected.

We met up at 9pm but due to me knocking off late from work, the rest had to wait for me to finish up my dinner which in the end dragged until around 930pm.

After I finished my dinner, and off we go to The Beer Market.

We went in and ordered our drinks and at the same time trying to find a table so that we can get comfy as we are gonna stay for football matches and have some bites along the night.

After awhile of watching soccer and chit chatting, at around 1030pm, one of them said his girlfriend is tired and he is leaving.

What the fuck rite

We only meet up like once per month and he sees his girlfriend everyday as they are colleagues at work.

What's with this seriously. Meeting up with us for just like less den 2hrs and not even finish watching one half of a football match.

I of course do know you love your girlfriend but have you like spare a thought for us ? We're like friends since 2001 which is like 12 years already and you can just abandon us just like that.

Two of them came down all the way from Yishun to have a meet up, one of them had an early morning shift from 7am to 4pm and he endured till 9pm coz he is looking forward to the meeting up to catch up with us as he works shift hours which is hard to accommodate to. For my case I'm just pissed off with you as you always fucking ignore my messages.

In the end we still organized the meet up as its been quite awhile that we had a meet up session and this is how you treat us ?

Seriously do you really think we're OK with it ? If you're gonna meet us for such a short while, might as well we cancel the meetup so that we can have time for ourselves.

Seriously be considerate for the others and dun always only think for yourself. Spare a thought for others, we have our own things to do too.

Ranting finish, logging off.