23-10-16

In life, we make alot of decisions.

And I am someone that is always unable to make decisions. Whenever I need to make a decision, I will ponder for a very long time.

I keep thinking in my life, how many correct decisions I've made and how many wrong decisions I've made also.

Suddenly one incident made me think of my decision making.

2 weeks ago I was supposed to go on a holiday with my frenz to Japan on the 29th of Sept, but because Kim So Hyun was coming to Singapore for her 1st fanmeet in Singapore and her fanmeet clashed with my trip to Japan.

So I decided to give up my trip to Japan and preferred to stay in Singapore to see her in person because she is one of my super favourite korean actress which you can see from my previous post.

So I told my frenz that I'm sorry because I decide to stay and see Kim So Hyun and not go Japan with them.

All of them were angry about it because they said I pang seh them because of one korean girl.

LOL !

Of course I know their anger from what I did but sometimes life is all about doing something for yourself.

I may have not been a nice person throughout my life but I can proudly say that I'm someone that has always try to think for others first before I think for myself.

Last time I was a very selfish person, I always think everything for myself first, trying to get out of trouble everytime when something happens even though I'm still lydat now. But over the years as I grow up, I feel that we need to sometimes think for others more and not everything for myself.

So as years goes by, I slowly slowly changed myself and think of others more.

Even when last time when I was working in the retail line, I always try to think for people first. Whenever they want to change my offday with me because they have something on, I would happily just change with them. But when it happens too often, people will just take it for granted.

There were a few times that I wanted to take leave to go overseas with friends, but as we know retail line means you have to work everyday so usually we only have an offday per week. So if we wanna go overseas means it will affect the offdays of other people which may affect their planning for their offdays. So everytime my frenz ask whether I can go for a holiday, I would tell them its kinda hard for me to go off for like a week or something.

And there was a time when my offday lands on a public holiday. For retail staffs like us, usually if our offday lands on a public holiday, we will be asked to work because public holidays are usually the day which is more busy den usual.

But this time round I was allowed to be given the off on a public holiday so I thought that maybe I can go out with my mom or my frenz as its a holiday for all of them.

And den, my colleagues at that time all approached me after they knew that I was given the off on the public holiday. All of them gave me the excuse of wanting to accompany their family because they worked retail line so its been a long time since they have accompanied their family.

To me its like, Yah, you all haven spend time with your family because you guys worked in the retail line so you guys wanna change the offday with me so that you guys can accompany your family. But when you all said this, please do remember your reason of wanting to change your offday with me also applies to me because I'm your colleague and so I am actually in the same shoes as you all.

So its like you guys need to accompany your family but I no need ? So I'm not married or doesn't have a girlfriend means I do not have to accompany anybody ?

All these happens because when you always try to be nice to everybody and in the end it bites you back. But I cannot blame anybody for what happen because its all because of my decision making that caused all these. If I'm always firm to my decision and not always try to give way to people, people would not take me for granted and will also think for people more.

But sometimes all these happens when you have experienced more in life. Sometimes when you encounter more hardship and you will think for people more and be nice because you do not want other people to experience something that you have experienced before. But sometimes we need to be firm and some people does need to experience hardship to be able to appreciate the person around them and the things they do for them.

Life is such a walk of experience.